All By Myself!

I am sitting here all on my own, no one to talk, just waiting.

Now it isn’t anything new but it is too me. Baba has been going off to his nannies houses for months now so that I can work but never to pre school.

Today he is at pre school. 

We went in he ran off and didn’t even say goodbye I stayed for forty-five minutes filling in forms and then was told by the preschool leader that he was fine, they would call if there was a problem. They will see me at 12.30!

So I could have come home and done some work, sorted the things that need to be done. I haven’t.

I have sat and ate biscuits feeling sorry for myself. Feeling almost rejected as he enters into the big wide world going places without mummy or daddy or any other family member in fact. He is taking it in his stride and I feel almost redundant.

I know that sounds stupid and Mr L just laughed when I said it, he on the other hand had a list of things that I could be getting on with.

“This is good, it means you can tidy and do your posts, and get the blog sorted. So weekends we can be a family and have weekends together. I can come home to a tidy house and we can just relax!”

Do you think he has been planning this for a while!

I know that he is right off course, they can’t be glued to you forever. But the difference is for 24 months Baba and I have been. But he is no longer a baby I want to call him that but he isn’t.

No longer are mummy, daddy and grandparents good enough he needs social interaction with children and he needs to be learning with children off his own age. I know that it is the best for him.

But for these first three and a bit hours I want to wallow in my self-pity and feel sad about my baby leaving and wanting to be somewhere else and grow up!